Politics & Other Mistakes: Cold shoulder
Al Diamon
Dazbog is a wedding photographer. He’d live in Portland if he existed, which he doesn’t because he’s a fictional character being used to make a political point. To that end, I’ll give Dazbog a comfortable home, a loving wife and two teenage kids, who huff glue while he’s off shooting weddings on weekends.
Dazbog is also deeply religious. But his is not your ordinary, everyday religion with prohibitions against stuff like eating bacon or drawing pictures of its prophet or going to Sunday baseball games or drinking beer.
What Dazbog’s religion teaches is that people who live in very cold places like Antarctica are morally deficient. Reprehensible. Disgusting affronts to the almighty.
Why? Well, for much the same reason that other spiritual traditions believe women can’t be priests or it’s sinful to drink beverages containing caffeine or cows should be able to wander wherever they like without human interference. It’s because Dazbog’s god says so. It’s not subject to negotiation.
Fortunately for Dazbog, his great grandparents moved to the United States many decades ago to avoid persecution. He enjoys a constitutional guarantee of freedom of religion. As a consequence, his life is swell.
Or it was until one July morning, when a couple walked into Dazbog’s shop and announced they were looking for someone to take photos at their wedding. Dazbog could tell immediately that something about them wasn’t right. For one thing, even though it was 80 degrees outside, they were wearing heavy-duty winter parkas, thick gloves and insulated boots.
“You … you are from Antarctica!” Dazbog cried out in horror. “You’ve come here to try to force me under Maine’s same-climate marriage law to take part in your godless ritual defiling the traditional nuptials of two people from temperate climates in defiance of holy scripture!
“Get out of my store, you … you … Ants!”
(For the record, “Ants” is an actual ethnic slur against people from Antarctica. As far as I can tell, it’s the only one.)
The two people were naturally taken aback by Dazbog’s outburst.
“You’ve got us all wrong,” said the woman. “We’re not Ants. We’re Oxycodone addicts, and we’re here to rob you so we can buy drugs.”
Upon hearing this, Dazbog was greatly relieved that he wouldn’t be forced to choose between his irrational beliefs and the possibility he’d be sued for discrimination. He cheerfully handed over the contents of his cash box and submitted without fuss to being tied up in his back room. Dazbog didn’t even care when the two junkies stole all his camera equipment, because neither riches nor possessions was more important than preserving the purity of his immortal soul from the sin of associating with Ants.
While this little fable has a happy ending, the folks at Protect Marriage Maine (warning: Some words may appear to be out of order) are insisting that won’t be the case if voters approve the same-sex marriage question on the November ballot. They sent me an email that claimed that if this proposal wins, “Citizens, small businesses and religious organizations would not be allowed to let their beliefs and traditions determine their decisions, and they would find themselves in legal trouble if they do not comply with the new law's heavy-handed mandates.”
Scary. And false.
Current Maine law already bans businesses from discriminating on the basis of sexual orientation. It also exempts religious organizations from being forced to do anything that conflicts with their beliefs about homosexuality – or, for that matter, people from Antarctica. As for ordinary citizens, they can harbor any prejudices they like, no matter how stupid.
If same-sex marriage supporters prevail, none of that changes. Individuals can still hate anybody they choose. Churches can continue to shun those they despise. And businesses that cater to the public will have to keep on taking the money of all customers, even if they don’t approve of their skin color, religious practices or sex lives. The law that’s in effect right now doesn’t allow for exceptions just because, like Dazbog, somebody happens to have a quirky set of moral objections.
In 2009, voters repealed the marriage equality law approved by the Legislature in large part because of phony claims about how it would require schools to teach children that some people are gay, and some of those that are might want to experience wedded bliss. There was no such educational mandate in the law, even though it’s true about there being gay people and all.
This time around, the same fearmongers have a different set of lies about how same-sex marriage will create a new class of lawsuits. They’re still blowing smoke.
It’s a free county. Like Dazbog, you can believe what you want. Of course, sooner or later, like him, you may have to confront reality. Which contains plenty of worse things than allowing other people – even those you don’t approve of – to be happy.
Ants in your pants? Express your agitation by emailing me at aldiamon@herniahill.net.
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Here we go again..."Al's Weekley Fodder for the Masses". So why has he not mentioned Boston mayor Meninos plan to use local inspectors to prevent Chick Fil A from opening a new business near his office all on the basis of the PERSONAL beliefs of those that own the business. They never once refused service and food to anyone. Wait, there is more. What about Philadelphias plan to outright ban Chick Fil A from having a location in the city based on these beliefs. Sound very tolerant to me...how about you? Sounds more like illegal to me. The militant gay and lesbian community is seeking far more of an agenda than just marriage. Do not forget the communist famous strategy of three steps forward and two steps back. They still advanced their perverse agenda albeit slowly. Applying marriage to the perverse homosexual lifestyle is only a first step and we must fight tooth and nail against it. Do not ever allow yourself to be called racists for not seeing eye to eye with a perverse LEARNED lifestyle (not a race of people) such as homosexuality. Do I hate these folks? Absolutely not. That does not mean that I cannot disagree with their life choices and not be a part of it. They are free to live as they chose, but I will not stand idly by and watch the sanctity of marriage between one man and one woman be desecrated.
"Of course, sooner or later, like him, you may have to confront reality." One of these days, weeks, months, years we will be confronting reality, as a town, county, state and nation. Washington DC is and has been broken for a long time. One day, we will face reality. One day, we will have to actually pay off all of our debt. One day, people will realize what is right and wrong, again. One day, we will mature, grow and prosper as one. One day, we will know what we once had, a democracy, freedom and the rulers of the world, because we will no longer have it. One day, this country will fall and one day, it will rise again, 10 times stronger than it once was, because you never what you have, until it is gone. One day, one day at a time, one day.
I'm a HUGE supporter of Protect Marriage Maine. In fact, I think that we should go ahead and ban love. There's too much love in the world. Love is the root of all evil. Many Maine children are going to bed hungry, our citizens are un and underemployed, drug use and the resulting crime are rampant in Maine, we have outsourced ourselves out of the job market, and many Mainers have no health care, but I see who loves who as the real problem in Maine. Please join me in legislating love.
Older White Males have lost their lead in the Race for Intolerance.
Congratulations to the New Reality.
Speak the Truth,
be careful your slip is showing. "rulers of the world" really? That's your idea of freedom and democracy. Sounds like your describing the Roman empire. Freedom and privilege for the "citizens", oppression and enslavement for the rest of the world.
China ,,,
Oppression and enslavement for the rest of the world AND their own citizens,,,,
I wont hold my breathe waiting for the perfect world to happen.
Whatever your idea of that may be.
But in the meantime,,,Life is Still Good.
citizengeorge- "be careful your slip is showing" what does that mean? and your interpretation sounds ignorant, but based on previous posts I have read by you, it seems appropriate. I was not describing the Roman Empire nor was I making the point of freedom for some and oppression and slavery for others... again, that seems to be your p.o.v., an ignorant one at that.
great chat, chief, keep it coming, it's only making things worse for your argument.
@Dave
The following quote was a response to Chick-fil-A's voice to support anti-gay campaigns:
"Without question, Dan Cathy (Chick-fil-a) has every right to voice his opinions and beliefs," Herndon Graddick, Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation (Glaad) president, said in a statement.
To me, that sounds pretty American and not very 'perverse'.
The people banning the Chick-fil-A restaurants are motivated PURELY by political gain. In response to your quote, "The militant gay and lesbian community is seeking far more of an agenda than just marriage".
What exactly is that agenda? To make everyone in the world gay? To me, this opinion is delusional and driven by paranoia. I do not personally agree with the gay and lesbian community being able to take the name marriage, but I do believe that they, like ALL of us deserve equal rights to voice their opinion. WHAT HAPPENED TO THE LAND OF THE FREE!!!!!!? Each person is entitiled to a pursuit of happiness and while doing so are guarded by the separation of church and state. Their interpretation of marriage does not involve religious context, which is why i personally believe the name should be changed, but all the same rights should apply.
I actually admire their community for being so driven and motivated to push the issue. Maybe if even a QUARTER of straight Americans possessed their drive we would solve the real problems that plague us instead of sit back and complain about them.
I admire and applaude commitment to a cause and effort also,,,,but if it translates to putting a gag order on opposing views or calling them haters...I dont think that's right.
This Chick Fil a thing is ridiculous.
So just to prove they aint backing down, a "kiss in" at the places,,,,,
Really????
So if someone suggests they "get a room" I'm sure it'll be considered a hate crime but the same thing could be said to a stright couple and no problem.
And this place has never done anything other than harmlessly and without hate or discrimination voiced their opinion.
This mindless militant stuff is really old news by now.
Very CHILDISH (and I apoligize to the children for using that term so I'll change it to IMMATURE).
Grow Up.
The politicians trying to ban that Chikwhatever place will run into a brick wall. It's a knee jerk reaction, and the bans won't work. But it's no worse a reaction than all this "sanctity of marriage" baloney. How is someone else's marriage going to harm yours in any way? The Land of the Free that we sing about should really be a land where people can live their lives with all the legal rights and privileges their neighbors enjoy. We don't have equal rights in the US until we have marriage equality.
Chick Fil A (and anybody else) has a right to voice their opinion "as long as" it does not conflict with theirs.
Is what they are saying.
Who really cares if someone is gay or purple or speaks klingon...
Everyone cares about someone trying to force something on otherwise innocent bystanders.
If minding my own business and treating everyone with due respect is not good enough for any particular group,,
I will happily live with whatever they choose to think about that.
Live and Let Live.
Try it,you might like it.